While this blog is geared towards helping people do awesome financial things like paying off student loans early, swearing off credit card debt and investing like a boss, it is also my personal blog and I would like to share something personal that hit me hard this past weekend.

I found out that a girl I went to high school with passed away from acute myeloid leukemia just 2 months ago.  She was 31 years old, same age as me, and worked as a lawyer.  She wasn’t really a close friend of mine and I don’t know if she even remembered me since high school was 15 years ago, but learning this news really got to me because even though I only had a few interactions with her, they were very memorable.

My family and I had moved to Maryland in 1999, so I was starting at a new high school as a junior.  Being an introverted person as it is, I wasn’t exactly looking forward to the experience.  I knew it would take some time to make friends since I didn’t go out of my way to talk with people all the time.  I remember the first time we talked as clear as day.  It was Spanish class on the first day of school, and there was a little lull as the teacher had just taken attendance and was getting her lesson ready I guess.  Everyone was talking with each other about their summer breaks and other first day of school stuff.  Most of my classmates went to school together for years and everybody pretty much knew each other except me.

Surprisingly, the girl seated next to me asked if I was new and we struck up a conversation.  She told me a few things about the school and gave me the lowdown on certain teachers.  She was a senior and shared a lot of helpful information.  I can’t tell you how much that meant to me being a student in a brand new school.  It really set the tone for the rest of the year.  That was the only class we had together and seniors didn’t go to class to much so I didn’t really see her too often, but anytime we would see each other in the hallway she would always smile and ask how I was doing and if I needed anything.  We didn’t really talk outside of school so we didn’t keep in touch after high school.  I remember her saying she wanted to be a lawyer so I’m glad she was able to reach her goal.

We all lose family or friends at some point.  For some reason, when I hear about someone young passing away, especially someone I have met before, it really hits me.  It shows the almost unfair finality and fragility of life.  It really touched me hearing about her death because of how nice and genuine she was.  Maybe if I got to know her better or made an effort to keep in touch I would have been able to have even more fond memories?  Perhaps I could have had an opportunity to help her just as she helped me?  All these questions run through my head, but thinking on this I feel I have learned a few things from this incident:

-It’s probably one of the biggest cliches out there, but live life to its fullest.  My friend was able to get her dream job and helped a lot of people along the way by setting up various charities.  Reading a little bit about her life and her altruistic nature made it more clear that she helped me out of the goodness of her heart.  But it can all end all too quick.  One of my good friend’s older brother died in a motorcycle accident.  A guy I knew in high school was killed in a car accident on a suburban side street.  One of my former co-workers was shot and killed for a few dollars in his wallet.  And now my high school classmate died from leukemia.  It can all be taken away so fast.

–Don’t sweat the little bumps in the road.  Just like we shouldn’t be freaking out or getting depressed about daily fluctuations of the stock market, we shouldn’t let the fluctuations of life get to us and deter us from our goals.  Plan for the long term and take the little things in stride, learning from them and becoming better people.  How many seemingly terrible things have happened to us in the past where we can look back on them and see they didn’t harm us all that much and we may have even gotten better from experiencing them.

–Always do good and speak good.  The Golden Rule is what comes to mind here.  I was a new student and my friend reached out and lent me a helping hand.  I appreciated that and I know that if I’m in a similar position to help, I want to help someone else like that.  You might only get a few interactions with someone, so make them memorable in a good way.

–Money is great, but we can’t take it with us when we die.  My friend was a lawyer and was probably going through a lot of the same financial issues many young professionals do.  Student loans, buying a house and investing for retirement.  But once she got the diagnosis, I could imagine none of that mattered anymore.  Money is a great tool to bring more happiness and security to us and our families, but in the face of death, it is worthless just as almost everything else.  This is more of a reminder to myself than anyone else, as I can find myself getting lost in the world of credit card rewards, student loans and investing.  It’s definitely enjoyable, but it’s not what it’s all about.

–Never underestimate the happiness you can bring to others.  We go through the daily grind and lose sight of the big picture sometimes.  We all have people that are very close to us and it would be unthinkable to them if something bad happened to us.  We all have people we care about so we should try to spend even a little more time together than we usually do.  Time is the ultimate limited resource and we’re all losing it every day we are alive.  Make use of it and spend time with those who genuinely care about you.

I’m surprised that the news of my friend’s death has affected me the way it has, but I’m grateful for the chance to re-evaluate my position and focus on what’s important.  Don’t worry I’ll still be posting as usual, but I’ll try not to get lost in it all and keep my mind focused on the right things.

It’s been a crazy fun week because my son is starting to talk finally!  He’s more like a parrot at this point but it’s so incredibly satisfying to hear him say even the smallest of words.  He’s been babbling for a while but looks like he’ll be saying real stuff in no time!  They grow so flippin fast.  Here are a few great posts I would like to share:

–4 Budgeting Mistakes (and How to Avoid Them) by Club Thrifty:  Budgeting is an essential first step to get your finances in order.  These are some good steps to not take when forming one.

–Society Makes It OK to be Broke by Eyes on the Dollar:  Should we call out people whose priorities are completely out of whack and are destroying their finances and their health?  Kim gives a personal take on this very situation.

–How Your Credit Score Affects Your Life + Credit Sesame Review by Making Sense of Cents:  Having a great credit score can make your life a lot easier and possibly save you thousands of dollars in your lifetime.  It’s a good idea to keep on top of it.

–Investment Noise and Why You Should Ignore It by The Wealth Gospel:  This is an awesome, incredible and insightful post about tuning out the noise when making investment decisions.  if you only read one post on anything, it should be this one.  It’s also a guest post written by me on The Wealth Gospel, also filled with incredible posts by Ben.

I usually enjoy writing about the latest sports news in these posts but man I don’t enjoy doing it today.  Very tough few weeks for the NFL as one star player gets convicted of domestic abuse and another one for child abuse.  The football games were good but its stories like these that seem to dominate the airwaves.  Hopefully players will be on their best behavior going forward so we can actually concentrate on the games themselves.

Hope everyone at FinCon has a great time.  I wasn’t planning on going this year but I’m looking forward to going next year hopefully.  Have a great weekend everybody.

–Pay Down Debt or Invest?  Implement FS-DAIR by Financial Samurai:  The decision to pay off debt versus investing is usually a difficult one with many factors involved.  This post provides a good rule of thumb for anyone having trouble deciding.

–The 4% Rule Examined by Dividend Mantra:  The 4% “safe” withdrawal rule is treated as gospel in some circles, but does have some drawbacks.

–6 Ways to Be More Frugal and Save Thousands by Making Sense of Cents:  Being frugal in one aspect of your life will help but not a huge amount.  It’s when you’re frugal in many things, especially big ticket things, that the savings can really add up.

–Why the Debt Snowball wasn’t for me by Student Debt Survivor:  Deciding between the debt snowball or avalanche payoff method can be a big decision, especially if you have large amounts of debt.  From a purely numbers perspective, the avalanche method is the best but sometimes debt payoff can be more than just numbers.

Ah the NFL season is finally here.  Can’t wait until Monday night when the New York Giants make their season debut against the Lions.  Here are some great posts to read in the meantime:

–Three Ideas for September by Dividend Mantra:  Jason was spot on in the intro of this post.  There was some time that most thought that the S&P was too high and a downturn was evident.  Sometimes it happened but for the most part, it didn’t.  That seems to be the sentiment nowadays as nearly everyone is calling for a correction, but to a long term investor, none of that matters.  If you stay the course and stick to your investing plan, you will more than likely reach your goals.

–The True Cost of Home Ownership by See Debt Run:  Before we bought our house, I realized from talking to other homeowners that there are lots of additional costs.  And boy were they right.  Even though we have a new home, things come up that need fixing and you can’t just call the maintenance guy up to come take care of it for free.  But as long as you plan for those costs, you should come out ahead versus renting.

–What’s Your Make or Break Number by The Broke and Beautiful Life:  Great way to focus on what’s most important in your financial plan:  debt repayment, investing and cost cutting.

–How I Graduated from College with 100k in Savings by First Quarter Finance.com:  There are too many stories of graduating with high amounts of student loan debt (yours truly included).  Nice to read a story about someone who graduated college with some savings.  Moral of the story:  Start making money when you’re 10 years old.

–3 Steps to Completely Offsetting the Cost of a Child by Mom and Dad Money:  Great post showing the power of saving on 3 usually big costs:  housing, transportation and investment costs.

–Ask J.Money Anything Day by Budgets Are Sexy:  A collection of great personal finance questions answered by the man himself.

NFL preaseason is underway.  Which means real football is right around the corner.  With all the unrest going on around the country and the world, it’s almost nice to know that football is near.  Is it a distraction or maybe an opportunity for togetherness and peace?  I guess it all depends on how you look at it.

–Are You Just Treading Water? by Dividend Mantra:  Excellent post talking about the dismal savings rate in this country and just why people seem ok with “getting by”.  It really pays to sit down every few months or so and evaluate your current expenses to see where you can save.

–3 Common Money Worries by Cat Alford:  Everyone worries about money at some point.  Be it retirement, education, healthcare or housing, there is almost always something to worry about.  The key is not to let the worries take you over but let it spur you to take positive action.

–If You Produce Nothing How Can You Expect to Make any Money? by Financial Samurai:  Most people like to whine and complain.  That’s why most people don’t become successful  You need to work hard and create something of value to be a lasting success.

–Do You Ask for the Order? by BrokeMillenial:  Great post on the importance of asking what you want.  It can produce amazing results.

Can’t wait for the NFL season to start.  That is all:

–A Singular Focus of Paying Off Debt Leads to Peace by Luke 1428:  What a great post on the almost spiritual effect of paying off debt.  While I can’t wait for the day my student loans are done, I can’t ignore the allure of investing into my HSA and 401k matches.  High interest debt should definitely be a priority, but giving up on easy and lucrative low hanging fruit like contributing to an HSA could be a mistake.

–Destroy the 40 Hour Workweek by Frugaling:  Great post that shows why the 40 hour workweek is so prevalent in this country.  This post went viral, and for good reason.

–Should You Stop Carrying Cash by MoneyNing:  We live in an a world where you can be a highly functional member of society without ever having any cash.  Banking, purchases and bill pay can all be done online now, and with all the awesome credit cards out there, there is not much need to use actual cash.  Once in a while I’ll come across situations where cash is needed, so I always try to carry a few dollars around.

–Four Reasons I Haven’t Paid Off My Student Loans Yet by Dividend Mantra:  A new-to-me blog I subscribed to that has some great posts.  There is something about Jason’s writing style that really resonates with me.  Anyway, this post gives a situation where you might not want to pay off your student loans super aggressively.  I hate student loans a lot, but not so much that I would want to get rid of them if I was fairly sure I could make more investing, especially in a tax advantaged account.  And the landscape may change (for example the student loan interest deduction could be eliminated) where I might not want to pay off the loans as aggressively as possible.

–Amazon: A Great Example of How Not to Live Your Life by The Wealth Gospel:  Somewhat eyebrow raising numbers on one of the biggest companies in the world, but I’m pretty sure they’re not in any trouble.  They are leveraging their present for future gains, which is a good move for companies and individuals with lots of money on hand.

Lots of stuff going on in the world lately.  From Palestinian children being killed left and right to the lives lost on the Malaysian jet liner, it seems senseless loss of life common nowadays.  Makes me feel really grateful for living in a safe place with enough food and resources to last a lifetime.  Hopefully we can use those resources to help those around the world who really need it:

–A Nation of Well-Educated Debtors by How to Save Money:  This post gives some scary stats on student loans.  Student loan debt is really affecting this country and it will unfortunately only get worse until a bubble or something drastic occurs.

–The American Dream Now Costs 130K by Club Thrifty:  The American Dream is this nebulous idea of having 2 kids, a house and a dog with 2 full time working parents.  This is also costs a lot of money according to USA Today.  Some of these expenses seem ridiculous.

–Are You Living the Life You Want? by Retire by 40:  We only get a finite number of years on this planet and we don’t get a do over.  It’s always a good idea to take stock of where you are in your life and compare it to where you want to go.  If you’re not in the right place, do whatever you can to get there.

–Weathering a Financial Storm by Student Debt Survivor:  They say two things are inevitable:  death and taxes.  Which means we should at least be saving for funeral costs and tax bills.  Add to that list car problems and medical issues.  Emergencies are going to happen and it is up to you to be financially ready for them.

–22 Things You Should Always Haggle For by Len Penzo:  Haggling is definitely an art.  Successfully being able to haggle can also depend on who you’re haggling with.  If it’s a low level employee, you’re not really going to get much help.  Always ask for a supervisor who can actually change things.

Ah only Lebron’s decision making (or lack thereof) could eclipse the World Cup final in sports news.  It would be pretty cool if he ends up going to Cleveland.  It would really transform his image from the guy who left his hometown to achieve glory elsewhere but now he can be the prodigal son who returns.  Once he makes a decision then the dominoes will start following.  While I would like Carmelo to come back to the Knicks, I’m not convinced he’s worth max contract money as he’s pretty limited defensively.  I guess we can only wait and see where these millionaires decide to go.

Here are some great posts that might not make you a multimillion dollar athlete, but will get you on a better financial footing:

–Double Dose of Credit Card Fraud by Broke Millennial:  Credit card fraud is one of those things that you always hear about but you never think it will happen to you.  But the fact is, it will happen to everyone at some point most likely.  Good thing the credit card companies are pretty good at detecting it nowadays.

–My Favorite Way to save Money: Do it Yourself by Common Sense Millennial:  When you hire someone to do a project for you, be it a big home remodeling job or an oil change for your car, you will mostly be paying for labor.  If it’s something that you would feel comfortable learning on your own, it can be worth it to do it yourself.

–Should I pay off my student loans with a huge lump sum payment? by Student Loan Sherpa:  Being able to pay off your student loans right away is admittedly a good problem to have, but if it is a lower interest loan, it might be better to put extra money into your retirement accounts.  But I wouldn’t question anyone who wants to make the lump sum and just get rid of the student loan debt shackles.

–How to Maintain a Good Work Life Balance when You’re Self Employed by Wealth Way Online:  I’m currently not self employed, but the ideas in this post work for everybody.  Basically, it’s important to take some time to yourself for reflection in order to re charge and to make sure you are working as efficiently as possible.

–Latest App-O-Rama by Your PF Pro:  I’m kind of a credit card junkie so I love reading about other bloggers adventures in getting multiple cards.  Looking forward to my next churn in a few months.

Been a crazy week with changes at work and job offers from other companies.  And a chance to strike out on my own.  I’ve never really been the entrepreneurial type, but am definitely considering it.  The first post of this week’s roundup reflects that.  Enjoy:

–Quit Your Job and Die Alone by Financial Samurai:  Though the examples in this post don’t apply so much in the field of optometry, the message is clear:  it is tougher to make a lot of money on your own than on the job and it’s tougher than most people make it seem.  There is a ton of work that goes on behind the scenes in any successful business.  Very thought provoking article.

–Save Thousands on Credit Card Debt with Balance Transfers by Broke Millennial:  Balance transfers can be useful especially for those with credit card debt, but they come with a pretty big risk.

–Proof Banks Caused the Financial Crash by Financial Samurai:  I’m a firm believer that it was the greed and incompetence of banks that played the major role in causing the financial meltdown.  This is another great post giving an inside look into the behind the scene workings of the mortgage industry.

What a crazy week.  I wasn’t even able to get a regular post out this week I should be back on my regular posting schedule next week.  Had a lot going on with some changes at work (all positive thankfully!) and family stuff.  Oh and my week long celebration of the Miami Heat losing in the Finals!  It was also quite amazing to see the way the Spurs easily beat them.  Even after being down 22-6 in the first quarter, you had the feeling that Miami could not maintain this lead and the Spurs would come back soon.  Not only did they come back and win, they beat Miami handily by a double digit margin once again.  It reminded me of the 2004 NBA Finals when Detroit easily beat the Lakers and their star studded roster.

The theme in both Finals matches?  Great teamwork beats great individual players any day.  The level of precision in the Spurs shot taking (and making), passing and player movement was amazing.  While the Heat put all their hopes on the shoulders of Lebron James, and big shoulders at that, it wasn’t enough to beat the best TEAM of the year.  Hopefully the rest of the league will take notice and try to play more team ball instead of letting the stars do everything.

This actually does lead into a good financial lesson: don’t put all your eggs in one basket.  Don’t just depend on one investment because if it goes south, you lose it all.  Don’t just depend on your job for the rest of your life because you may get laid off or your position might even cease to exist.  Keep your skills and knowledge current and look for other sources of income to fall back on.

Well if you read all that, you deserve to read these great posts I found this week:

–Five Reasons Why You’ll Never Be Rich and One Reason Why You Already Are by Financial Samurai:  Sam continues to put out quality posts, and this is certainly one of them.  We all want to be wealthy, but very few get there.  Find out some of the reasons why.

–How Paying Off Debt is Helping Me Change My Life for the Better by Disease Called Debt:  Very enjoyable post about the positive changes that can come about from paying off debt.  I have seen some of these changes myself in my quest to pay off my student loan burden.  Looking forward to that payoff day, and beyond, is what’s keeping me working hard and trying to find new ways to make some extra monies.

–Can Getting Fit Improve Your Finances? by Money Rebound:  In general, taking care of your health will reap financial benefits.  It can give you more energy, force you to spend less on eating out and hopefully help you avoid medical costs associated with poor health.